Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
