If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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