I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize