You're so nebulous sometimes
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
is wine microwaveable?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
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