And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize