There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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