So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize