You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize