My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
