4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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