I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize