Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
whose ass print is on the piano?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
