Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
she peed on how many people?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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