I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
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