Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
I'm really busy with my period
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