the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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