how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I love having hate sex.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
