gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
