stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
a search helicopter?!
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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