is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
