we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize