i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
