your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
