i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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