I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
you had me at cake vodka
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise