Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
