I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize
