my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Enjoy the penises
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
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