i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Randomize
