she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
pop tarts are not kleenex
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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