I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
