It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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