I like to think it a success when the cops are called
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
