i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
