We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
