Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I don't deserve a penis
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
