i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
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it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
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He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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