Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Randomize
