so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
