apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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