I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i carry you out of a forest
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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