Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
No subtext here. People are naked.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize