Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize