SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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