Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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