Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize