also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
