did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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