only if we run a train.
done.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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