dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
